Flouncing & Onion Eyes

16 Oct

Oof. What a long afternoon. Long enough that it’s now eleven o’clock (an hour past my bedtime, now that I am Old And A Parent) and I’m still too wide awake to sleep.

Not a big day because I got a lot of writing done. I only wrote maybe four hundred words (pretty good words, though). And not because of Zach, he was quite well behaved. Nah, it was a long day because I officially signed off of AW. ‘For keeps.’

Of course, ‘for keeps’ is about as permenant as ‘forever’ and it doesn’t matter what age you are, ‘forever’ is about as effective as a six year old going I’ll be angry forever! It lasts until the next shiny comes along. Writers are mostly six-year-olds who talk too much and think too much (I’m an optimist; some writers don’t think nearly enough).

But still, I left. It was nerve-wracking and exhausting to type up the post, it was increasingly heartbreaking to read the posts that followed (and with every single one that I read, I thought was this the right thing to do? and became increasingly uncertain).

My reasons why are still my own, although I am noticing (he says quietly, vaguely, unhelpfully) that they are reasons which a number of people seem to be aware of and share, and that bolsters my confidence that this is the right thing to do.

I will say: It’s not because I’m struggling to focus on my writing. I’m really not. Except for days like today, when I’m just tired (I had a bit of a flu over the weekend, I think it was leftover from that). I write pretty well and I can take or leave AW as I need to, these days. I couldn’t always, but I could these days.

There’s no real point around this post. Just the late-night ramblings of someone who’s wide awake, darn it.

Okay, something interesting, I guess: I have told my wife about an invention of mine who pops up now and then at night and cares the crap out of me. She (the invention) has gotten more refined ove the years. I call her the Onion-Eyed Girl. Which is to say her eyes are the color of little white pearl onions. Recently, I realized that her hair is always damp and when you lean over the edge of your bed and look at her, lying under your bed, she alwyas opens her mouth and nothing comes out but the sound of gurgling water.

(You think that’s weird, you should see how she looks when she turns up exactly and vividly pictured in my brain at night and I wind up sleeping on my back because I’m too creeped out to roll over)

Anway, tonight I realized that what made her even more freaky is that her onion-eyes aren’t normal people sized, they’re really big. LIke if you stretched your eyelids open all the way? A bit bigger than that. Big, big white empty eyes and the open mouth gurgling.

…Okay. And I’m sitting in a dark living room by myself.

On AW, one of my profile notes pointed out that I was still scared of the dark if I populated it correctly. now you have an idea of how I populate it.

And, creeped out, I am going to go hide in bed next to my sensibly sleeping wife.

Good night!


Posted by on October 16, 2007 in Uncategorized


14 responses to “Flouncing & Onion Eyes

  1. Deek

    October 17, 2007 at 3:08 am

    I’ll miss you on AW, peedee, even though I’m, uh, not allowed to be there to miss you.

    But you were the best.

    Better than.

  2. Shadow Ferret

    October 17, 2007 at 6:00 am

    You’re afraid of the dark and yet you sleep on your back? I hate to tell you this but that makes you ripe for getting your throat slit by onion-eye girl. That’s why I sleep on my stomach. So no one can choke me or slit my throat. Just some friendly advice. 🙂

  3. Haggis

    October 17, 2007 at 6:29 am

    # 1, I’m not a she.

    # 2, I don’t gurgle.

  4. Pete Tzinski

    October 17, 2007 at 7:13 am

    I realized as a kid that if I slept on my back, then I could see the room and then I could fight back. I’m more comfortable being able to see the room. (Horribly uncomfortable, though, sleeping on my back.) Of course, I was fooling myself as a kid, if the Onion-Eyed Girl ACTUALLY rose up to get me, I’d probably just pee myself and make whimpering noises. I mean, who are we kidding here?

    Haggis, you’re on the other side of the bed, I checked. Maybe you should look at who else is down there with you? Just saying.

  5. MidnightMuse

    October 17, 2007 at 7:53 am

    Well now I don’t feel so bad thinking there’s a disembodied hand that can reach me from any edge of the bed if I were to dangle my foot out from under the covers !

  6. Pete Tzinski

    October 17, 2007 at 8:23 am

    I’m going to be no comfort to my child in a few years… 🙂

    ZACH: Daaad! There’s something under the bed!

    DAD: Is it the onion-eyed girl who is forever shouting and drowning and nothing is coming out of her mouth but the sound of gurgling water?

    ZACH: No!

    DAD: Is it a hole appearing beneath the bed out of which slithers a hundred thousand tentacles and they are all reaching for you to pull you under into the nameless abyss?

    ZACH: N-No..!

    DAD: Is it all of the dead babies in the world, returned to life with sharpened teeth and called Pinskies in mythology come to strip the flesh off your —


  7. Jodiodi

    October 17, 2007 at 8:36 am

    I love the onion-eyed girl. Please write about her. She would so fit into a book I’m working on.

    As for leaving AW, I’ve got to say I’m really sad about it. I don’t know what happened but I’m sure you have your reasons. I’m just being selfish because you were one of the people I was comfortable with on the board. Even though we didn’t really talk, I found your presence comforting (I know that sounds weird). I think your personality came off as friendly and laid back and you were so well-liked and respected on the boards, I figured it was safe to post in threads you were in. Weird, huh? I know I’m not explaining it well, but, well, there ya go. Good luck with your endeavors and I’ll try to keep up on here from time to time.

  8. Soccer Mom

    October 17, 2007 at 8:56 am

    Pete, this reminds me of a Calvin & Hobbes, from “Something Under the Bed is Drooling.”

    CALVIN: Are there any monsters under my bed?


    CALVIN: If there WERE monsters under my bed, how big would they be?

    VOICE: Very small. Go to sleep.

    Panel of Calivn and Hobbes huddling together with a baseball bat.

    HOBBES: Something under the bed is drooling.

    And BTW: You should sleep on your side with the covers wound around your neck to keep you safe from Nosferatu. Not that I would do that. Just saying.

  9. MidnightMuse

    October 17, 2007 at 9:10 am

    Oh yeah, I almost forgot – you can’t sleep with your neck exposed! And don’t piss off any teddy bears before you turn out the lights. And if you’re trying to convince yourself that shadow on the wall is the tree branch from outside, it helps to make sure there really IS a tree out there.

    Just sayin’

  10. Shadow Ferret

    October 17, 2007 at 9:17 am

    Pete, teach Zach about the force field.

    As a child, I was terrified of the monsters that lurked everywhere in the edges of the dark and I created a force field that I turned on ritualistically every night before bedtime. The shield surrounded the bed and protected me. That’s why I’m here today.

  11. sanremoave

    October 17, 2007 at 11:40 am

    This is why I never had dolls and stuffed animals as a young girl. I couldn’t keep my eye on ’em while sleeping.

    That clown doll in Poltergeist really freaked me out.

  12. Pete Tzinski

    October 17, 2007 at 11:41 am

    They’re HEEEEEEEre. *shudder*

    I always felt justified in my fear of Furbies and Teddy Roxbins. I feel they should all be burned at once.

  13. Melaniehoo

    October 17, 2007 at 12:27 pm

    Pete, best of luck to you, your family & your writing. And ditto on what Jodiodi said, I feel the same way.

    As for the creatures under your bed, I’m the same way. I cannot watch or read anything scary or I won’t sleep for weeks. I used to have nightmares from the Freddy Kreuger movies – just from the commercials! I’ve never even seen them. I finally got over the dangling foot issue when I moved to a country that doesn’t go below 90 degrees – too hot for covers.


  14. kimmirich

    October 17, 2007 at 3:54 pm

    Owww! You too on Furbies huh?
    Yikes, those critters under our bed, spittn’ out dust bunnies every nite…….



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