13 May

May I just go on the record as saying…

…every single screenshot of the new Speed Racer movie (by those illiterates, the Wachowski Brothers) don’t remind me of the old Speed Racer cartoon, and they don’t remind me of anything Wachowski related.

No, what they mostly remind me of is the TV show Lazytown, that terrifically baffling kids’ program which produced this pirate song that you’ll never get out of your head ever again not if you live to be a thousand.

Honestly, they have the same color scheme, and possibly the same intended audience (although I happen to think that being an adult and watching Lazytown is no great sin).

Barring that, then the most Speed Racer The Movie Film For Theaters manages to remind me of is the terrific “Racer Dee” episode from Dexter’s Laboratory, said episode being a terrific and hilarious parody of Speed Racer in the first place.

Oh, it makes the brain hurt.

Best thing to do: Don’t go see Speed Racer.

Besides, why not go see Iron Man? Not only was it incredible incredible incredible, but it’s got Robert Downey Jr. in it who is utterly more attractive than Speed Racer guy, I’m afraid.

Stay tuned, I’m sure, for the Michael Bay live-action production of Astro-Boy.

(A live-action Dragonball Z would be eighty-six hours of grunting and straining at each other…and it would probably be inflated to one hundred and forty hours by director Peter Jackson, for the DVD release…)

(…yes, I will stop blithering now and go to bed.)

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Posted by on May 13, 2008 in Uncategorized


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