There is something on my mind, and I have no idea what it is.
This is something that happens to me all the time, which I never understand and which I’m sometimes not aware of: I get hung up on something, without a discernible reason.
This latest instance: two days ago, I remembered I had the BRAVE blu-ray and hadn’t watched the special features on it. I don’t always watch special features, except when it comes to animation and then I watch everything I can glean out of the discs. So I watched the special features over the course of the day. Then, yesterday, I watched BRAVE.
Today, I finished the few special features I found on another disc. The kids want to watch a movie this afternoon, and the ONLY THING I want to watch is BRAVE. Again. Also, my radio stations around the house have gone Celtic and Irish and Scottish. For a bit it was some fiddle. For most of the morning, it’s been the beautiful and elegant music of Cecile Corbel.
I don’t want to watch anything else, but I’m not sure the kids want to see this again, so I’ve proposed we watch…THE SECRET OF THE KELLS, a gorgeous film not entirely related to BRAVE, but not so far removed.
This happens all the time. I’ll get completely hung up on an author, or a place, or a piece of art. It can be maddening when I get stuck on a single album or song and it just stays on for ages and ages.
Sometimes, something comes out of it. I’ve had things I’ve been stuck on which have resulted in stories. That doesn’t always happen, though. I can get completely buried in something and nothing ever appears from it.
Eventually, too, the hang-up goes away and suddenly I can’t be bothered to touch the thing, not at gunpoint, for awhile.
It’s some subconscious part of my brain working something out, and rather than analyze it too thoroughly (I don’t know how to analyze the deeper parts of my brain anyway) I just go with it and trust that maybe it’s doing something useful SOMEwhere.
(At the same time this hang-up started, a short story of mine that’s gone through three busted drafts burbled back to the surface, and I can’t stop thinking about it. I wonder if it’s related, or gonna fix? I guess we’ll find out.)